Happy 5th Birthday, Clarissa!!!!

My baby turned five today. Sniff. Sniff. I can't believe she's five already. And when we return from vacation, she'll have the weekend to get ready for her first day of kindergarten. WOW - where has the time gone?!

We spent the day at the Fort Wayne Children's Zoo, since it was free to get in with our zoo membership from home. It was also free parking, so that was another pretty cheap, yet FUN day. YAY. The kids LOVE all the interactive things at the zoo, and Jacob had saved his quarters for the duck feeding stand. The weather was perfect, and it was the perfect way to celebrate CJ's birthday.

Thanks to a wonderful angel, Clarissa was able to go to her FAVORITE restaurant for dinner tonight--Texas Roadhouse. She asked me to thank my friend again for the giftcard because she LOVED that treat and it was no longer in the budget after our car trouble last week. She enjoyed her meal, especially the peanuts, and she liked when the servers danced.

Yogi Bear Campground

The kids were ecstatic to go back to Yogi Bear campground for swimming yesterday. It was such a LONG day, though they did great and had so much fun. They rode water slides for almost two hours, and Jacob tried a speed slide for the first time! I at first said no when he asked to try it, but I decided that I have to let him try new things, especially since he doesn't usually want to try things. So, I said yes. He went. He survived. LOL. And he LOVED it!!!

Beach Bums

We spent the day at Pokagon State Park. The kids had SO much fun -- especially in the water. Here are a few pictures to show our fun day. Where else could we have so much fun for $7? Oh, $13 - I forgot about the pony rides.

Fish Tales

WOW! Both my kids have the fish tales gene. LOL. They're having so much fun out here. They've both caught more than ten fish, and Jacob's highlight was catching a cat fish. Last time we were here, only CJ did that, so he's thrilled that he got one. Aside from that one, most of the fish have been pretty small.

Here is Jacob out enjoying a boat ride.














And here he is later explaining how big the fish was that he caught.














And here CJ is out on the boat.














Unfortunately, she can REALLY tell the tales!!!! She caught a small rock bass, but she said it was "as big as a shark."

On Vacation...

After a week of car troubles and other uncertainty, we made it to the cottage for vacation. We've already been out on the boat a few times, and both kids have caught quite a few fish. Jacob caught a catfish already, and he's ecstatic because Clarissa was the only one that did that last time. Now Clarissa can't wait to catch one again!

We spent the day at a local campground today that has three pools and a small water park. CJ went on a water slide for the first time today, and she LOVED it!! She went a few times and cried when I dragged her out to leave. She can't wait to go back later in the week.

Thank you for all the prayers and good thoughts this week. I had a roller coaster week, and I appreciate all the positive vibes you all sent me. I really should not be spending money on vacation after all the money I spent on my car to get us here, but I need this time.

And as you can tell from this picture, I've already been soaking in the sun. Ahhhhhhh.

Gratitude

grat·i·tude
–noun
the quality or feeling of being grateful or thankful: He expressed his gratitude to everyone on the staff.

While I still feel emotionally defeated, I thought it only fair that I also share another emotion I have toward a very special person right now. Gratitude.

I feel gratitude toward an amazing woman. She has no idea how much I appreciate her kindness, and she can't even imagine how perfect her timing was. I have more problems than I care to share online, and I'm having such a hard time right now that I can't even talk about it. But she always manages to bring a smile to my face. She doesn't know the depths of my problems, yet she knows just how to make me smile and realize there is hope.

I won't "out" her in case she doesn't want me to. If she wants to be known she can comment here. But please know that I am ETERNALLY grateful for your thoughtfulness and hope to meet you sooner rather than later. So, from the bottom of my heart, thank you for being you.

Defeated

de·feat (dĭ-fēt')

1. To win victory over; beat.
2. To prevent the success of; thwart: Internal strife defeats the purpose of teamwork.
3. Law To make void; annul.

Today, I feel defeated. I don't know what God has in store for me or what all this crap in my life is supposed to be teaching me. I also still think he's picked the wrong person because I CAN.NOT.HANDLE all this! I'm a little lost, and quite frankly, I'm a little angry. Most of all, I'm just defeated.